Old World Blues
by Botchman
Summary: There are many warriors in the cosmology of the planes. Thankfully, some are aligned with the will to do good. Finn and Jake are enlisted to stop an ancient evil slumbering beneath the earths crust, and are forced to make new friends of old enemies. Includes O.C, no flames please.
1. Chapter 1

**Old World Blues.**

It was a day of much beauty in the Land of Ooo. The multi-formed birds were raucously singing their afternoon chorus whilst for miles all around their enchanted glades the sun's benevolent rays seemed to bless each blade of gently swaying grass. To the far east, beyond the rolling hills of moorland, lay the Candy Kingdom on its painted horizon of strawberry pink and fire-burst red. From afar, the high towers caught the sunlight and seemed to pulse out into the world, a beacon of civilization to those with a sugar content above eighty six per-cent. (Princess Bubblegum's orders, excluding friends and relations of course.)

However, the addition of this dream-like kingdom neither helped nor hindered the natural world. It knew the peace of the babbling brook and fertile soil and would get by very well, just as it had since the dawn of Ooo, without interruption from strangers.

Yet on this particular afternoon, the land of Ooo got both.

A small family of daisy's sat over-looking a mellow pond when suddenly several ripples began to dance on the surface of the water.

"Daddy!" said one of the smaller flowers, swiveling its petals and looking over to the direction of the pool.

"Daddy look, something's making the water go all splashy!"

The father daisy merely laughed heartily, and looked fondly at his offspring with simplistic black eyes.

"Ha! Now how would you know that Rodger, we're blind!"

But the pleasant conversation of the flowers was soon cut short.

The rumbling soon increased to a peak, whereby there was a bright flash of light, instantaneously replaced by a man. At least it was a creature that resembled a man.

A set of shimmering full plate armor flashed from beneath a grey leather trench coat, yet the brow above it was complete with at least as many creases as the garment. Slowly the humanoid turned its head toward the chatter of intelligent plant life, revealing an ashen grey face complete with many scars and bandages.

Although this sight was lost on the daisy family, he stood out as a warrior of much power.

"Who…who's there", asked the father flower hesitantly.

The man in grey's tattered ear twitched, zeroing in on the plants fifteen feet away.

In the next moment he was crouching over the daisies, yet to an observer, no time had passed at all. The breeze created by his incredible speed caused their petals to flutter haphazardly as the man adjusted his moth eaten New York Yankee's baseball cap, a relic from a by-gone era.

"You…" Came a voice as gnarled as bark, yet as calm as a sea breeze.

"You will direct me to the greatest hero's of the material plane. I am in a great hurry to stop a clear and present danger, and shall require their assistance."

The daisy family, more relieved now that they were talking to a do-gooder of sorts, smiled up at the stranger and offered what little advice they could give.

"Ooohhh, well that would be Finn the human and Jake the Dog. They're pretty cool guys. They've saved us lotsa times before. In fact, they live rather near here."

The stranger delivered a curt nod. It was time for introductions.

"I am Solomon of the Aries clan, and hail from the Twin Paradises of Bytopia. Who pray tell are you, flower?"

The father daisy, slightly shaken, answered as best he could.

"Er…I'm Tim, and this my wife Agnus, and our son Rodger, and we hail from…this nice tuft of grass. Oh, say hello everyone."

"Hello..." cooed Angus and Rodger together, never once forgetting their manners.

Solomon simply nodded to show his respect.

"Your knowledge of the local area has proved most valuable, Tim flower of Grass tuft. But alas, I will need your services a while longer."

In the next millisecond, Tim the daisy was pulled up from the soil by the clump of earth that Solomon cupped in his palm. Before Tim could make any protests, Solomon had already presented a clay flowerpot from the folds of his trench coat and tenderly patted Tim down into his new digs.

"TIM!.." Shrieked his wife.

"Honey, your roots aren't entwined with mine anymore! Wh…where ARE you!"

Rodger was starting to cry, prompting a response from the stranger.

"Have no fear. Your father shall return presently. In the meanwhile, I swear by Elysium that not one iota of harm shall befall him whilst he serves as my guide."

Tim, after hearing this job opportunity, took to his new role with an enthusiasm that surprised even him-self. He bristled his white petals and looked up into the worn eyes of the vigil.

"It's alright everyone. I need to help Mr Solomon save the world. Rodger, you're man of the tuft until I get back, okay."

"O...okay…" Rodger sniffled, putting on his brave face.

"Time grows short." Said Solomon frankly. "We must be away…"

"Lets go." answered Tim in a harsh whisper. "I am soooooooo ready."

Solomon backed up a few steps, widening his stance as he did so.

"Farewell flowers, and know that you have my gratitude."

Then Solomon, with Tim's flowerpot tucked safely beneath his arm bolted across the hills, sending a fine spray of earth up into afternoon sunshine. The resulting air pressure would most certainly have crushed the daisy, if Solomon had not expertly tilted the pot to receive the brunt of this force.

In six seconds, they were out of sight.


	2. Chapter 2

**Old World Blues. Chapter 2.**

"And that should be..."

Began Princess Bubblegum, craning over an archway stuffed full with electrical components to switch on a filament bulb.

"...the finishing touch."

There was click, followed by a warm electrical hum as power flowed throughout the inner workings of the mechanical arch.

She stepped back to admire her handy work.

In the centre of the arch there lay a steel-rimmed chair, and sitting in the chair there was sprawled a man made entirely of meat.

Meat man, (for that was what he was called) had seen better days. He wasn't used to having whole chunks of himself taken out and served up at 'Pinic-palooza', yet against doctors' orders, it seemed that he'd learnt his lesson the hard way.

"Urrgghh..." He moaned, twisting in the chair, taking care not to tear at the bite-marks that riddled his porky-sausage body.

"It's just as well you guys got him to me when you did." Announced Bubblegum, as a blue corona of energy flowed from speaker-like funnels in the machinery, filtering down into the pained occupant.

"If Meat man had gotten here even an hour later, we may have been too late. He's dangerously low on protein content."

Relieved, Finn and Jake wiped each others brows and gave each other a bodacious Hi-five.

"Nah, that's alright Peebs." Said Jake, a little remorsefully.

"I knew there had to be a limit, it just took me a while realise if he was hurt or not from...you know...supplying the sandwich filling."

"Like GLOB he is!" She shouted over to her slowly re-generating patient.

"When I tell you that your body cannot sustain a protein synthesis mitosis pattern, IT MEANS, you don't offer yourself to everybody who wants a bite! YOU GOT THAT!"

Meat man sobbed a little as the wave lasers slowly refilled his missing parts.

"I'm sorry..." He sniffled.

"It's just that, I wanted everyone to have a good time, and the chicken filling hadn't arrived yet, and…and...IV'E GOT SO MUCH LOVE TO GIVE!"

As a defiant gesture, Meat man ripped off a part of his left shoulder and hoisted it aloft to the heavens, yet as he did so, his arm started to wobble and in seconds he crashed back against his chair, unconscious from his exertion.

"Woah" whispered Finn. "That was hard-core".

Bubblegum smiled at her two heroes, having safeguarded her kingdom's inhabitants yet again.

"A thousand thanks to you Finn and Jake. I'll take care of Meat Man for the time being, as for you two, I guess you can go back to enjoying Picnic-palooza. I hear they've got a great trifle this year! He's doing stand up."

The two awesome adventurers were content.

"Super!" Said Finn, heading to the door of the laboratory.

"Unless, you got anything else what needs a good decking."

Princess Bubblegum laughed a pleasant regal laugh.

"I'll be alright, thank you guys. You deserve some time off though, I'm not a slave driver after all…"

The room seemed to darken slightly.

"Unless I have to be."

Jake laughed nervously, stretching a noodley arm twenty feet to the door in a bid to hasten his exit.

He was beaten to it however.

Footsteps were heard on the other side before a little black bootie kicked through it, essentially smashing the wooden door into matchwood.

Peppermint Butler stood in the ruined doorway, seething with visible panic and sucking up the biggest breath of his life.

This lasted several seconds.

"Um…" Finn began, loosing himself in P. Butler's lengthy inhalation.

"Is there something you wanted to…"

"HIGH POWERED ADVENTUER CLASS HEADED THIS WAY, THE SCANNERS ARE GOING KABLOOIE MACHO LOCO! TWO MINUTES TILL ZERO HOUR!"

The babble of words evidently meant something to Princess Bubblegum. She tilted her crown forward and grimaced, rushing over to where her minty fresh subject stood gesticulating.

"If that's true then your place is with me. Finn, Jake, we need to see what this stranger wants."

The four of them bolted down the grand staircase and across into the main hall.

"So what the biz PB, you expecting a creep to crash the house?!"

"Not quite Finn,…"

Bubblegum heaved open one of the palace doors and pointed in the direction of the Castle walls.

"Peppermint Butler, I'll need you to alert the gumball guardians if the visitor turns out to be hostile."

"B…but Princess,…" the dapper peppermint hesitated.

"Whatever should we do if the stranger has an encounter level higher than 14?!"

For a moment Princess Bubblegum, supposed princess of a whole land, looked completely blank.

"Then may Glob have mercy on our souls." She said finally, before leading Finn and Jake over to the entry portcullis.

Enough time remained however for Finn to voice some perplexing questions.

"Hey Jake, I'm missing something about this whole stink! Why's PB so worked up about some dude she's bleeped on radar. We've taken down every evil bozo that ever tried to put a dent in Ooo. Did she just forget or, like, she don't think we so fly anymore?"

Jake shook his head, straining to keep up with the pace Bubblegum was setting.

"I don't think it's that man. It's just that it's a big world. Some dudes have spent way more time doing our shtick. I'm talking crazy powerful guys that could…I dunno,… punch holes in the sun…or punch a guy in the gonads SO hard he'd implode."

As Finn and Jake reached the front gate under royal escort, Finn thought about how hard he would have to punch the sun in the gonads to make it implode. This thought provided a small amount of comfort as swarms of banana guards rallied on either sides of him, ready to raise the bars.

This ultimately proved un-neccerssary.

The tempered criss-crossing metal suddenly started to shudder in its housing, vibrating at a speed that caused an almighty ringing throughout the court-yard.

Instinctively, the Candy Kingdom's defensive formation moved backwards, aware that the metal had begun warping into gnarled old branches like that of an ancient tree.

For a moment, the newly created logs swelled into their most natural position before shattering into mass of splinters and sawdust.

A lone figure walked through the tumult of wreckage, cloaked in the thick dust of what had just been wrought steel, and carrying what seemed remarkably like a pot-plant under his arm.

"If he was going to smoosh us…" whispered one of the banana guards to Jake.

"…he'd have totally done it already. He may be looking for…er…directions or something."

"Aw Glob…" said a strained voice behind them. Jake turned.

An impaled banana guard crouched with a leafy branch through his torso.

"It's alright…" he croaked.

"I can walk it off." And then set off to exact his recovery.

Solomon walked through the dust and stopped short of Finn and Jake.

"That's them, sure as sure can surely be!" Tim the flower chirruped in his clay pot. It was still a little uncomfortable, but he was quickly getting used to his new-found freedom, although a little daunted by the task ahead. He had already been briefed.

"Excellent." Boomed Solomon as Finn grimaced, reaching for his golden sword with a red-jewelled hilt.

"A creepo like you has got some some explaining to do!" barked Jake, readying himself to morph into a cannon at a moments notice.

Solomon introduced himself.

"Do not be troubled adventures, for I seek an alliance with you to save this world."

Finn would later be quoted to say that the mission Solomon presented to them was 'seven kinds of divided math!.'


	3. Chapter 3

**Old World Blues: Chapter 3:**

Presently the court of the Candy Kingdom was dismissed of its soldiers as Princess Bublegum gradually started to believe the stranger's good intentions. And those of his pot-plant.

The Pink princess had suggested they carry out the rest of Solomon's briefing in a small restaurant on the south side of town, to help show the public the threat the gentleman posed had been taken care of.

"Awwww Snap son! We gonna 'Sprinkles'" yelled Finn excitedly.

"That's so fly! You know the hot chocolate Speedy makes is sooo thick, you'd swear it was liquid muffin!"

Finn did not have to repeat himself. The reputation of 'Sprinkles' was sufficient enough to ease all their worries for the time being.

Together, the royal escort approached a squat building with interlocking candy canes propping up a roof of impressive gingerbread.

It had been created with royal funding after all.

Finn was first to push through the twin doors of raspberry swirls and approached a golden booth reserved for the princess.

"I hope you don't mind, Solomon of Aries." Whispered Princess Bubblegum as Finn and Jake were let in past the dividing rope to bounce on the plush seating.

"I need to be seen taking care of matters regarding your entrance, and considering the gravity of the mission you're about to propose, a treat will do us all good."

"Understood." Confirmed Solomon gruffly, filing in opposite Jake and sitting down to look at the menu.

A mint cookie candy person walked up in an orange bow tie clutching at a small black notepad.

"Princess, and esteemed guests…" announced the waiter.

"Sprinkles is so glad to see you back so soon. What will the royal tongue and it's counterparts taste today?"

Finn and Jake suddenly started to wrestle one another in a bid to but their hands up first and procure one of the fabled hot chocolates.

Despite Jake's attempts at morphing into a straightjacket, Finn had squeezed his hand up and yelled out his order.

"ONESUPERMALLOW-CHOCWITH STRAWBERRYFOAMPLEASETHANKYOU!"

"DITTO!" cried Jake soon after, and the two collapsed into a giggling heap.

"I'll have a peppermint tea, and a raspberry toffee cake to split between us." cooed Bubblegum, not forgetting her regal charms.

The cookie-waiter smiled graciously then turned to the battle-hardened man in the ragged baseball cap.

"Errr" he began, unsurely, shocked by the countenance of the stranger.

"And for you?"

Solomon bent low over the table, doing his best not to seem intimidating. He failed of course and the mint cookie was spun into a mild panic at the stranger's demands.

"You will secure the finest fertilizer for my guide, Tim flower of grass tuft, then you shall bring me a mixture of honey and sugar, crafted in equal measure and finely dusted with the shavings of an Astral plane beetle."

The waiter simply shook in his boots, frantically attempting to scribble down each detail of the warrior's curious order.

Bubblegum interjected.

"Sprinkles doesn't serve that kind of pallet Mr Solomon. The material plane is much different to your own in terms of culinary ingredients don't forget."

It was now Tim's turn to speak.

His flowerpot had been placed on the tabletop and was content with admiring the view, if not for the prospect of a delicious snack.

"What he means is he'd like of molasses. Though you'll have to forego the beetle Mr S."

The daisy and the warrior nodded to one another in mutual understanding.

"Acceptable losses." Confirmed Solomon, straightening his armor.

"Please, proceed with the order."

The waiter was glad to get away, and ran back to the kitchen.

"So what's the happs man" yelled Finn excitedly.

"What's this uber-dangerous mission to save all of Ooo. C'mon don't leave me hanging!"

"Yeah what Finn says, like, does it pay good? It's not illegal is it?"

Jake attempted to scrutinize Solomon's motives but fell short of acquiring anything from his bandaged poker face.

There was, however, a more pressing matter that needed taking care of.

"A moment!" Solomon boomed, reaching into the pocket of his grey coat.

He put that moment to good use, retracting a small television aerial with a square crystal of quartz wired up to its base.

"First I must calculate your experience levels. If they are too low, I shall have to decline you immediately."

Without another word, Solomon pointed the aerial at Jake and pressed a bandaged thumb to the square crystal. A small whirring sound was heard as, alarmed, Jake took the form of a knight's shield, wary of any harm the device could pose.

"HEY! No one said ANYTHING about a doo-dad!" Jake complained.

"If you're trying to steal my funky powers then my buddy Finn will cream you up royal!"

"Royally royal!" Finn confirmed, raising two fists at Solomon and making mock jabs under his chin.

This threat of violence soon proved un-necessary as the aerial ceased bleeping and Solomon pulled his cap low over his eyes so he could examine the result on the quartz surface.

"Interesting." He concluded, much to the Princess' scientific curiosity at such a machine.

"Species: Dog. Level Seven Rogue Class with infused shape-shifting properties. Current X.P level, '77'. A good start."

He moved the aerial over to Finn, who, understanding the purpose of the device, threw away his menu and puffed out his chest, hands on hips.

"AAwww I get it! It measures how awesome we are!"

Finn pressed his face up close to Solomon, a wry smile wrinkling his boyish features.

"Do it man! Check out DEEZE MAD SKILLZ!"

In compliance, Solomon tapped the display, pointing the aerial between Finn's eyes.

Finn could only shake his hands in abject excitement.

In a few seconds the results had been tallied, leaving Solomon to study the screen with all the focus of a laser pointer.

"Incredible…" Solomon announced, a twinge of awe in his normally monotone voice.

"Species: Human. *Genetic strain: Pure. *Radioactivity variants: Zero.

*Pathogen contamination: Zero. *All round damage to cellular configuration. Zero!"

Solomon looked disbelievingly at the boy in front of him.

"Humanities legacy lives on in you Finn the Human. I shall have to update the archives on my return to the Twin Paradises.

But Finn merely dismissed what deep down in his heart, he already knew to be true.

"Yeah, yeah give me a number-crunch man! Add THAT to your library or whatevs. SEE MY POWER…power…power…power…"

Finn cupped his hands to echo himself a fashion that bordered theatrical.

This continued until Princess Bubblegum gave him a gentle slap across his head.

Solomon looked down at the display and read the figures aloud.

"Level Five Fighter Class: No latent magical abilities. Current X.P level. '59'. An average score."

"THAT'S ALL!" yelled Finn, spitting out his hot chocolate into Tim's flowerpot and banging his fists on the table. Several of the eating candy families turned their heads in alarm.

"C'MON MAN! I'm way stronger that a '59!" Jake got over seventy!"

"It is as the scanner indicates." Announced Solomon, un-phased, sipping at his molasses.

"I got a '3'" said Tim beaming up a Princess Bubblegum.

"I'm pretty pleased with that, I'm no pansy after all. I'm a daisy."

"Any…way…" Bubblegum hesitated, weirded out by the direction the conversation had taken.

"Solomon, my warriors…er…Finn and Jake will hear your proposal now. They've fought the lich on two separate occasions and lived to tell about it and I know that they can handle any quest you have in mind."

"Indeed." Solomon confirmed, erecting himself to full height so that his tarnished plate-mail jutted like the bow of a ship.

"There exists a creature…" he began, waving his crooked hand across the table.

"A creature of such un-natural power and strength that it has wiped whole dimensional planes out of existence. It eats to sustain itself, and it sustains itself by eating whole worlds at a time."

Finn gaped at the concept open mouthed. Jake extended a noodily arm to gently push his jaw back in place.

Solomon continued, his hardened eyes portraying the full terror of his knowledge.

"In the past I sought to imprison this creature in pocket universes where it could do no damage, trap it so that I could put off the fight for another day. But I was foolish. It's hunger is insatiable, and it has recently learnt to break down the barriers between the planes. I have full reason to believe that it will appear in about a week to devour the material plane…for yours is the most vibrant of them all."

"But…you got a plan right?" said Jake, raising an eyebrow to the height of the ceiling.

"I'm not going to get iced just to prove a point to some demon."

Solomon nodded, aware of the companies' anxiety.

Setting down the aerial scanner Solomon produced a torn map from the larger of his coat pockets.

He laid it out by its moth-eaten, yellowing corners and pointed to a small ink blotted circle surrounded by archaic runes. Finn recognised the area as being on a small island off the east coast of 'Ooo' and shuddered silently in his skin at the thought of crossing the ocean.

"This is a world basin." Explained Solomon.

"It is a weak point separating two worlds, and out of all of the material plane, this is the only basin large enough for this…"

The warrior paused, unsurely.

"For the Obyrith Lord Dagon to pass through."

A sharp gasp was heard across the table, and Princess Bubblegum clapped her hands to her mouth.

"Princess?" Said Finn worried. "I swear we won't let him touch this place, whoever he is! You heard what the 'S' man said, we gonna gang up of this guy."

But Princess Bubblegum soon composed herself, shaking her head all the while. There was a trace of

"No…you won't Finn. Dagon was supposed to be a legend, spawned from the 89th layer of the abyss. The fact that he's coming now could spell the end times. There's a chance that not even you could…"

But Jake raised a stretchy finger for shush, because every single candy family in 'Sprinkles' had stopped eating and had turned to the royal booth to see if they could discern what was being said. They had been moments from starting a panic.

Quietly. The mint-cookie waiter deposited their raspberry toffee cake and sped over to another table where a small lollipop wanted some crayons for the cross word on his menu.

"Which is why…" spoke Solomon, hunching over so he could whisper into their ears.

"…we must be quick to recruit more members to our cause. Tell me Dog, what make you of this?!"

Solomon handed Jake the aerial scanner and pointed to a red looping pattern on it's crystal. It seemed to be sweeping across a mini-map of 'Ooo.'

"Errr…" said Jake, turning it over several times.

"Oh!...It says. *Ahem*:, Species: Vampire. Level Eight Undead Class.. Current X.P level, '97.'"?"

"Hey that's Marceline!" cried Finn, jumping across to Jake and peering over his shoulder.

"An ally of yours?" said Solomon. "This is most advantageous. We shall need all the help you can supply."

Princess Bubblegum leaned over.

"You missed one Jake. Species: Humanoid. Level Nine 'Blizzard Wizard' Class. X.P reads at '104'!"

"ICE KING!" grumbled Finn. "No way we letting him on our road trip! I don't care what the numbers say he'll stink up our ride. That is so NOT MATH!"

"Numbers are pretty much the definition of math Finn." Frowned Princess Bubblegum. She continued.

"I will grant him amnesty if he will agree to provide back up for you. Wizards are powerful after all."

"So we are agreed." Solomon boomed, standing up and motioning for the waiter. He produced a single platinum coin, tossing it onto the serving tray.

"Let us unite with your allies and rid us of this foe. Take courage Princess, for the troubles of this land are tackled by those few who owe it the most."

And with that the growing fellowship marched onward, eager to take the first steps toward what was going to be their most climactic battle yet.


	4. Chapter 4

**Old World Blues Chapter 4:**

"It could be all yours you know, when I'm dead and gone. Well. That is to say. Dead, but still here. You know that's kind of funny Hah! When I die, I'll probably just re-appear in my office!"

That last syllable 'ffice' flicked off the tongue of Hunson Abadeer with such venom that even Marceline had to shudder.

Not that Abadeer had intended what he said to sound harsh. On the contrary he was being un-characteristically liberal to his daughters wishes. The reason Marceline had shivered was because her father, Lord of the Nightosphere, had LITERALLY just flicked venom off his tongue, which had fallen to the floor of her quaint living room and burnt a small hole in the turquoise rug.

"Oh.. Sorry honey." Abadeer apologised, taking out a blood red handkerchief and dabbing at his lips.

"I get it dad, and the answer is still 'no'. I'm not interested in commanding that whiz-hole. Did you want something to eat?"

Marceline drifted airily from her position on the couch (or rather, over the couch) and into the kitchen where upon she set about rustling up some grub.

"That's alright dear, I ate before I got here."

With that, Abadeer's stomach physically trembled, emitting a muffled shriek, which gradually grew to be less and less noisy.

Marceline wafted over with a chilled garland of red roses and started draining the colour from their petals.

She paused, then turned to her father, sitting comfortably in a plump armchair.

"Look, I appreciate that you're getting to grips with my lifestyle now, but I still haven't forgiven you for trying to brainwash and steal me away.

Abadeer laughed, fondling a pointed ear.

"Oh my Marceline, you have your mother's determination. Besides, I SUCCEEDED in brain washing you. The only tragedy is that you broke free. Heh, give me some credit sweetheart."

He re-crossed his legs, wrinkling the pitch-black trousers in the process, then knitted his hands together, completely content. The worst part was that Abadeer had believed that most recent exchange to be normal conversation.

Marceline sighed, tweaking off her levitation and slumping hard into her sofa.

Their family reunion was going to get a lot tougher before it got better.

She was still thinking this when her father sat bolt upright and craned his neck to peer outside a panelled window.

"Well would you look at that..." He hissed, turning the words over like a worm in his mouth.

"It seems your tasty friends have come over for a play date."

Marceline was sucking up the red from her last petal, and almost choked when she saw her father slide over to the front door.

"Daddy NO!" She yelled, as Abadeer turned the doorknob.

Slowly, cautiously, Hunson Abadeer retracted his scaly hand. He turned back to Marceline with a pointed smile.

"Oh, no, I quite understand Marcy. Just the old instincts kicking in there. I'll leave you and your friends alone together. Heh, don't want an old fuddy duddy like me cramping the style, I can relate."

Marceline watched as the Lord of Evil moved over to a nerdy caricature 'Phil' face, drawn on the wall in black ink.

She saw him take a carton of bug milk out of his tailor-made pocket.

"I'll take my leave now Marcy, but just remember, soon you'll have to start thinking about a future career and what you want to get out of your un-death. And when that happens, I know you'll make the right decision."

Abadeer grinned placidly, trying his best to appear like a sinister father. He did this because 'sinister' was a considerable step down from sadistic, and Abadeer had learn that compromises had to be made. For the time being at least.

Quick as a flash, Abadeer spun the carton at the wall, then seemed to loose his temper as his flesh warped, twisting out the sounds of his incantation.

"Maloso vobiscum et cum spiritum!"

The homely wall split open in great craggy chunks, revealing a swirling tumult of fire and brimstone that cascaded down into a lower and darker dimension. The Nightosphere had been unleashed, and with it the howling of the dead, as vivid to the ears as colour to the eyes.

Marceline backed away to watch the spectacle unfold, her father stepping through the void as calmly as if it were a front door. He turned, features warping where the red light fell.

"The offer is always open Marceline." He growled as his organs un-knit themselves and squeezed down into the eye of the storm.

"Just come over some time to keep your old man company, Heck! I've got more power than I know what to do with. And I think a taste will do you good."

Finally, Abadeer's exposed brain fed itself into the portal, triggering the wormhole to close up with a stuttering pop.

Marceline was left all on her own.

"Pffbbt. Whatevs Dad."

She spun low to the carpet, picked up her axe-bass, then wafted over to the brown door.

She may not have looked it, but the vampire queen felt very much in need of some company at that moment. She was glad her friends had chosen to see her on today of all days, seeing as her father's visits were random and left her slightly rattled by their end.

There was an impatient knocking which did the job of breaking her trance.

"Just a second."

However, no sooner did Marceline twist the latch than in burst a long nosed mage in plump blue robes and golden crown. To add to this disaster of fashion the creature had what looked like an electric guitar slung over it's thin shoulders, only this guitar had what looked like dried macaroni stuck on its edges in lopsided, unimaginative smears.

"Hey Marceline!" Crooned Ice King, using his beard to propel himself through the door.

"WHAT IN THE!, Simo...er...Ice King we don't have basketball for another week yet!"

"Naw that's not it sugar." Ice King landed and bounded up to Marceline, genuine excitement flooding his light blue eyes.

"Didn'tcha hear! We're all going on a road trip! THE GANG'S BACK TOGETHER AGAIN! Oh it's gonna be so much fun, we can make sweet notes together, and make each other bestie bracelets, or..."

Ice King took hold of Marceline's hand and rubbed it against his wrinkled face.

"We can stay up till dawn and talk about boys."

Marceline drew away, an expression of mild disgust present on her pale face.

"Yeah, real sorry about this Marceline." Announced Finn apologetically, wiping his feet on the mat.

"There's like a super important thing we all gotta do that's all like 'oh snap the world will go ba-donks!'"

Jake shook his head, morphing his feet into a pair of boots so he could wipe something to.

"Nah, you're building it up too much. We'll probably just find this demon guy quadruple team him, and mop up the fleshy confetti."

Then he turned to Finn with a worried look on his stretchy face.

"Hey dude, did that sound too harsh."

Finn waved him down.

"It's alright bro, you're just super pumped to pump this chump in the dumps."

Marceline smiled at the way Finn punched the air. His pun had been awful of course, but that child like enthusiasm did more for her than breaking a pixies' neck. Evil pixies of course, she'd matured since then.

"Really?" she questioned. "A dungeon crawl? Sorry Finn but that's not really my biz!"

Solomon's hulking frame suddenly filled the doorway, with Tim under his arm.

"It is all of our 'biz', vampiric maiden, lest this world fall into dis-repair. It is vital you join us as we mount an offensive against Obyrith Lord Dagon."

Finn snapped his fingers.

"Oh yeah and this is Solomon, and the flower dude's Tim. Solomon's kinda serious but he's doin his job I guess."

Marceline chuckled, strumming a cool riff as she thought it over. Finally she beckoned her chums (and Solomon) to come sit down.

However her wariness of the stranger diluted her normally easy-going vibe.

"I thought you had like an extra-planar assault team to deal with that kind of stuff, why don't you just call out your buds from wherever you're from and go take care of it, okay strange dude?"

Solomon stiffened as he felt his pride being challenged. He had chosen to stand where as Finn and Jake were sitting, and made good use of his posture now. He grimaced, which caused the bandages around his face to tighten, then arrested the vampire with a burnt finger.

"To prevent Dagon from slipping through the dimensions any further the council of the twin paradises have re-enforced the dimensional barriers leading to each plane. As of around twenty minutes ago inter-dimensional travel is now impossible, lest Dagon emerge upon this world pre-maturely."

If that was the case, Marceline thought, where abouts was her father at this precise moment in time? If not in the Nightosphere, he would have had to be pulled into the Astral plane. The idea of him being sucked out of subspace and flung into the world between worlds was in many ways, hilarious.

The room darkened as Solomon narrowed his already thin eyes.

"Believe me when I say that we are this world's only hope, and mind your tongue when you talk to me girl, or I shall have it out."

Marceline shot a sour look his way.

"Look, Solo'moron'. You might think you're all high and mighty in the celestial worlds, but I don't feel like goin out today, so you might have to ask nicer."

She struck some strings to make her point, floating up close to the warrior.

Marceline matched his gaze without faltering, despite the stop sign Jake had moulded out of his flesh.

"I'm sure you'll think of something…" Began Marceline, hammering her point home.

"I mean it's…urggh…its not like…grrrr…its not….WOULD YOU CUT THAT OUT!""

Ice king had taken this time to start racking at his chords, trying way too hard to look cool as he did.

"What?.." he asked, oblivious to the P.V.P battle

"I know, never had a lesson in my life, but that's only if you play manual. This is an ELECTRIC guitar! I just gotta figure out which HAPPNIN TUNES are programmed in."

He gave way to shaking the instrument at ear level, trying to get the musical notes to fall out.

Marceline sighed, worried about what would happen to the insane wizard that housed the remains of her dearest friend.

"Fine I'll tag along." She submitted.

"But if this dude does anything to crimp my crests, I'll personally stomp him"


	5. Chapter 5

**Old World Blues Chapter: 5.**

Considering the size of the recently swelled party, Finn and Jake had thought it best to rustle-up enough provisions for their journey to Monolith Island, taking a quick detour to the tree for in order to supply. However, the question of its location had the sane members of the fellowship puzzled.

"Monolith Island?" Questioned Finn, hauling great stacks of sausages and cheese wheels out the front door.

"Dude, that place sounds sweet! Hey Jake how come we never heard of it before, I bet it's got lotsa sweet dungeon plunder!"

Jake, who was moving out the remaining two knapsacks of food and bedding in the guise of a bulldozer, did his best to answer.

"Dunno man, its not like we plan our dungeon crawls. Oh! You think Monolith Island is full of monoliths? Finn, I'm always telling you we need a monolith the living room."

Finn smiled, flashing a gangster pose.

"We need a lump of stone because we ROCK so hard!"

Ice King stood outside, surveying the hero's digs as the Vampire Queen hovered next to him. He called out to them in an excited, child-like manner.

"Ah, don't pack any gherkins guys, I hate gherkins. They give me wind, and well…that causes issues when you where this kind of get up." He then turned to Marceline, shyly prying apart his beard and pushing it back together.

"Heh, this baddy won't know what hit him! Check out these sweet moves Marceline Hoo-cha!"

Ice King stuck out a skinny blue leg from under his robes, and then tilted back on his heels, thrusting it as high as it would go.

The karate kick (for that's what Ice King had intended it to be) found its mark, arcing upwards into his face with a wet 'thud'.

Marceline had to look away as she bore witness the shambling actions of what had once been Simon Petrikov, hopping around with his foot wedged in his face by the toenails.

"Aw geeze, oh no…" Ice king squawked, flailing his hands around, then stood still upon his one leg and scratched at his chin, deep in thought, all the while the foot stuck fast across his icicle of a nose.

"You know something's not quite right with the move but I just can't put it into words. Ah well!"

"Just…don't,…" sighed Marceline in the kindest way she could manage.

Turning away the straw hat she wore cast her sheek opal hair in an even darker shade of black, yet somehow it succeeded in the opposite effect, giving her a sheen of radiance that could have reflected her innermost caring nature.

One might have thought her dead heart, hanging motionless inside her ribcage was beating afresh for the first time in centuries, giving the Vampire Queen a new vitality.

Then she turned back to Ice King and the moment passed. He caught her eye.

"Hey baby impressed yet?" He said coolly, foot still plastered in face.

"Oh my Glob Simon will you just give it a REST!"

She still wasn't used to seeing him like this, and deep down she knew she would never come to grips with it.

And then Solomon was besides them.

Marceline hadn't even heard him approach, so quick his land speed must have been to warrant the surprise.

"We are almost ready to depart." He grated, swiveling his fractured, bandaged hand to point to a forested road in the distance.

"It is important that we take the low roads. This will lead us down to sea level with minimal encounter probability."

The battered warrior then presented the clay flowerpot with its occupant daisy.

"Tim informs me that the soil of the marsh levels do not contain many nutrients and so can't support an eco-system. We should be able to pass through without attack."

Tim whiffled his petals up to Marceline's increasingly souring face.

"I've got a bachelorette in agriculture!" Tim beamed.

"OH, you do, do you?" She smiled evilly, making no effort to hide the fangs that filled her mouth like chainsaw blades.

Marceline flipped forward in her levitation, so that her darkening face was level to observe the small flower's shivers brought on by fear.

She licked her teeth with a forked tongue, chuckling sadistically. The thought process now buzzing in the more malicious part of her mind was that if she couldn't make Solomon shake in his boots, she'd do the next best thing to his companion. Just to make a point of course. It was doubtful she'd have traumatized the daisy if the stupid little thing were on its own.

"You know I could do with a nice salad right now…" She hissed, taking pleasure in the way that Tim's petals started to quake. Now, if she could just nip a single petal off the little daisy, one of the smaller white things on it's topmost edge, that would illustrate her point perfectly that the Vampire Queen didn't take any sass.

The fangs came in closer, but just as they reached their critical juncture she was suddenly distracted from her defiance by two luminous golden fingers that suddenly hovered between her eyes. Marceline's face twitched then a second later reformed in to an angry scowl as she realized her jostling with Solomon had come to threats.

"You hesitate in bullying a defenseless sapling." The warrior said with a voice of such utter contempt it seemed that he wanted to be pushed over the edge.

"Why is this? Could it be because I have charged in my hand the divine spell 'Searing Light', capable of warding off most undead beings with a Hit-Stat of below three?"

Marceline turned her full attention on Solomon, ready to contort her pretty ashen face into something grotesque.

"But you're too strong for that aren't you. Albeit prepared at its lowest level I judge its discomfort to be equal to that you are prepared to cause to Tim. All I ask is for your co-operation."

"OH, big man! You should know that the pain just makes me feel more alive!"

She raised her sharpened fingers at his head but by this time, both Finn and Jake were peering anxiously over to where their fight was about to break out, a look of genuine horror wrinkling their faces. If Marceline had to guess it was because of the more pressing matter at hand. If half of their fellowship got taken out before they even set off then Dagon the Obyrith Lord would have an even greater advantage than the one he currently held.

A fine sweat was breaking out over Tim's pollen-clad face.

Even if Marceline pounded Solomon into beef jerky, she would eventually need his help in the boss-battle to come. She would have to swallow her pride for the time being.

"Yeah fine, you're no fun." Marceline spat, turning in the air and floating over to where Finn and Jake were dragging over the huge knap-sacks.

"But just so you know, I'm helping my BUDS out, then I'm gone. OK. I don't follow orders, I dish em out and when you're nothing but bones, you're gonna find out all about that!"

Her words were as harsh as they were provocative, but Solomon stood firm.

He instead raised his arm, and by telekinetic force alone pulled Ice King's foot free from its painful 180-degree angle.

"OW! …Not so rough …HEY!." He exclaimed, wheeling round to face his adversary."

"I saw Marceline FIRST do you hear! What with Bubblegum turning our relationship into a 'will they won't they' deal, I need backup options!"

"You are strange." Solomon boomed, walking up to Finn and shouldering a bulging bag of supplies.

"When and if we survive this quest, I suggest you seek medical attention."

His full plate armor agleam in the afternoon heat, Solomon had just taken it upon himself to lead the company off when Jake stopped him, a noodily arm snagging his shoulder.

"Wait up dude. We gotta lock the door first. Wouldn't want any thieves coming and taking our things while we're away…or BMO."

From high above in the leaves of the tree fort, a lattice opened, revealing the small boxy frame of B.M.O, waving her heroes off.

"It's funny because I'm a liability!" She hollered.

"Good bye brave adventurers, Oh! Finn, Bring me back a 'biiiggg' ruby ring from the doubtless treasure chest and I use for the make believe of the marriage!, if you please, would not mind."

"Will do B.M.O!" Shouted Finn, and then turned to the path that lay before him, sword drawn.

"Yo Jake, let's scout it out! "

In an instance Jake had expanded himself under Finn and was running toward the tree tunnel on the horizon.

"Hey dude, we should sing our scouting rap!"

"Oh Yeah! I'd totally forgotten about that!"

"**Scouting is dull, cos it's not a real fight, cos, we're just Looking Around, and, you know that ain't right! I gotta have some action Now, gotta have it real hot gotta have it real loud, NO reconnaissance!" **

Jake hummed to himself in thought for a moment before turning to Finn.

"I still think we should made the rap about all the good things to do with scouting."

"Nah man, they'd be expecting that, we're making a point…er…cos it's art."

Marceline hovered after the bodacious brothers, anxious to keep some distance away from Ice King who started hiking next to the stoic figure of Solomon.

"Just us bachelors hey? That's cool, that's cool. So like you seen much action lately you 'Play-ya' cos the women must dig dose scar blows! Heh…Am I right?"

Solomon simply glanced at Ice King before silently matching Marceline's pace.

It would be a day traveling at least before they reached the beachhead.


End file.
